How To Break Limiting Beliefs And Live A More Fulfilled Life
Originally destined to be a doctor, Emily Wysock-Wright started her journey towards her medical degree at St. George’s Medical School in London. However, in an ironic twist of fate whilst learning how to look after others, she struggled with her own health issues. Taking time out to rebuild and recover, she volunteered in orphanages and townships in Ghana and South Africa and it was here that she found her true passion of helping others realise their full potential. Since her time in Africa Emily has qualified in 10 different fields of expertise including nutrition, spiritual counselling, kinesiology and behavioural coaching and most recently founded Adira, a bespoke, personal and unique programme of seven fundamental steps to achieving self-rediscovery.
“My journey was raw, honest and a real insight into the developing world. Food was scarce, but they made nutritional, whole food meals from what they had. I also learnt a lot about what made people happy, for example the importance of community and the essential need for love – not only towards others, but for themselves – and the difference that good health can make to your life”.
Adira Founder Emily Wysock-Wright
Here Emily provides us with an insight into why as human beings we often allow ourselves to live limited lives and how we can break potentially harmful cycles
Why do we let our own mind limit ourselves?
I like to think of our brain as a programme, or a piece of software that has been created with autonomic systems that require programming from the moment we are born. Between the ages of 0-7 years old, we spend our day’s engaging between Alpha and Theta brainwave cycles. Essentially, we are mini-beings walking around in a permanent state of hypnosis, living in conscious creation and directly downloading the world around us. Nature created these first 7 years of download hypnosis, to predispose our little-brains to observe other people’s behaviour and to understand our environment in order to directly download our subconscious foundation.
From the day we are born we need to be fed and cared for. Love is essential for our survival and it is deep within out autonomic nervous system to expect this feedback-loop of love. We become ‘meaning-making-machines’ and egocentric in order to make sense of the world around us. We believe that our environment and the people in it, are the way they are because of us. If they’re happy, it’s because of us, and, being a child we observe these reactions and directly link it back to our own behaviour to make sense of our environment. Unfortunately, this also happens when people around us are unhappy or unsatisfied - we link this back to us and can’t comprehend anything other than our behaviour to be the cause for this.
For example, a parent who always swooped you up on walking through the door on one particular day doesn’t. They seem really un-happy and in your bid for their attention, you’re sent to your room. You expected the welcome you usually get, and instead there was a negative reaction. Not only has the expected not happened, and this must of course be your fault, you then try to validate yourself as the cause of their unhappiness that evening, and your needs aren’t met. Instead, you’re dismissed and all you can hear is the continuation of arguing downstairs. It’s all your fault. You can’t understand what is going on, but it feels horrible. Your brain is then searching for an explanation for what’s going on, as its new and uncomfortable for you, It’s impossible for you to rationalise your parent’s world and the intensity of the behaviour is actually because your parent has been made redundant and they can’t afford the mortgage payment. You can’t see this intensity is for love and care for you and your family when you’re egocentric. All you know is this is uncomfortable and the only way your brain can make sense of what is going on, is by thinking there is something wrong with you…’I am not good enough…’, ‘I don’t deserve their love…’.
After this conclusion is made, we continue to set ourselves out to seek more validation in this belief. For example, your mother tells you to be quiet ‘because what you have to say isn’t important’, or your father doesn’t want to talk to you ‘because he doesn’t love you’, and without even knowing, we have created a belief with our own deficiency and we do it to make sense of our environment. We continue to play out these same unconscious scenarios until we become aware that these belief systems about ourselves and life, are deeply infused within our unconscious brain and we may not be aware of this process and how they affect us, but they will show up in our behaviours, our achievements and how we chose our relationships.
So now you can see how we get these self-limiting beliefs in the first place, as a coach, I want to show you which limiting beliefs to work on first and how to work through something that might have taken several years of programming.
And remember, a limiting belief can be a negative or positive emotion. The main distinction is that it limits you in some way – anything that is happening in your life today, anything that disturbs your peace, gives access to a limiting belief.
Steps To Breaking Limiting Beliefs
By going through this process, you’ll not only learn to identify limiting beliefs, but also the same step-by-step approach I use with my clients to transform them into new, empowering beliefs. You must take time over this exercise to fully trace patterns and steps that are limiting you from realising your true potential.
Think of an area in your life, relationship, or business where you feel stuck or are experiencing a lot of challenges or upsets. Think of a specific event that happened recently in that area that caused upset.
Think about the event and identify what you were feeling during the upset
Think about the same feeling and trace it back to an earlier time where you were having that same kind of feeling.
When you think about the earlier time, what is a belief that you may have made as a result of that upset? This belief should either be about you or about life in general.
When you consider the two events, do you see a similar theme between the two?
Now that you have the wisdom of years gone by, can you see that the belief is made up and not true? What is the truth?
Go back to the recent event and apply the truth to it. How could you have seen it differently or behaved differently if you had been operating from this new truth?
Now that you know this belief system is not serving your higher purpose, you can finish this exercise by asking what would you tell your then child-self and what can you do and say to comfort that little-being who is desperately trying to make sense of the world around them.
If you’re like me, the synchronicities within your life are often too clear to ignore and there comes a time where looking within is the most sensible option to understand why this is being shown to you and to clarify why barriers keep getting put up. Self-rediscovery is a deep, challenging but soul nourishing experience. It is how we grow, expand and build abundance within our lives, and I am so privileged to support women on this journey and show them how strong, noble and powerful they are. This is why I created Adira.
Adira Philopsophy
Adira helps women understand the choices they make and will empower them to make the right ones, not for everyone else, but for themselves in the future.
The programme
Adira is a bespoke, personal and unique programme of seven fundamental steps to achieving self-rediscovery.
Through a combination of mindfulness, nutrition, sleep and exercise, Emily and her team of experts will help you set boundaries, find a balance and achieve lasting and transformative results.We all have opinions of ourselves or our circumstances that can put invisible barriers on every area of our lives. A limiting belief is something that doesn’t necessarily serve what your higher purpose for your life is. As a result of a limitation, you can build your story based on the limit as opposed to having a belief that serves what you want.
For more information about the Adira programme please visit www.thisisadira.com
